Okay, so if you have a Bible, please turn with me there to Ephesians 4. Ephesians 4. I’m going to read from verse 11 to verse 16.
And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds, and teachers to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ.
Until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes, rather speaking the truth in love.
We are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.
11 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, 14 so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. 15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love. (Ephesians 4:11-16, ESV)
Okay, let’s pray. Holy Spirit, we ask that you give us revelation and understanding. We want to know how to be, grow to grow up in every way into Christ, who is our head, head of the church. We want to become like him in his speech, in his actions, from his heart. We want to learn how to do this. How do we speak the truth in a loving way? Thank you, Lord. In Jesus’ Name we pray, Amen.
So just based on the verses that we read, I want to ask a question, and it’s not rhetorical, so if you have an answer, please share it. What does it mean to speak the truth in love?
15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, (Ephesians 4:15, ESV)
Ephesians 4. It outlines, even in the verses that were just read, it outlines Satan having many ways to derail us. Satan has many tools in his toolbox.
Did you know he uses doctrine? That’s one of the ways that he derails us. It’s a wind of doctrine because doctrine is not the same as the truth. The truth is God’s truth. Doctrine is man’s interpretation of the truth. And we could get it wrong.
We could emphasize something a little bit too much, and it’s just our human interpretation based on something which is true, but it’s really just man. Yeah, we could take it out of context. We can just share it little bit imbalanced. What we’re saying is true, but it’s not going to really help the person who hears the doctrine. So Satan uses doctrine. Satan uses human cunning. Satan uses deceitful schemes. And if you read the rest, if I encourage you, just read all of Colossians 2.
If you want to know what tools that Satan has in his toolbox, it’s listed there. I’m going to just bullet point them.
Colossians 2:8. Satan uses philosophy.
8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. (Colossians 2:8, ESV)
I know a friend, he went into philosophy and he thought that by going into philosophy he would figure out the meaning of life and he would be able to use that to bolster his faith. I think he shared with me in the past, the more he goes into philosophy, the less answers he gets.
And instead, I think people who really go into this direction, they become captive by it because there’s no absolute truth in philosophy. It’s just man’s way of trying to. It’s just theories, it’s just interpretations. It’s just doctrine. It’s coming from a man. And so there’s no real liberating truth there.
Colossians 2:8 mentions human tradition. And don’t we have a lot of traditions? And maybe it was established the tradition with a good intention, but over time it becomes this rigid thing and you have to do this. And nobody even understands why we have to do this.
Churches do this, families do this. Like we just say this is our tradition. And so like it or not, you gotta follow it. So the traditions, it’s coming from man. And so that’s the common thread. We want to be careful.
Doctrine is from man, cunning is from man. Deceit comes from men, traditions come from men. And Satan uses all of these things to derail us.
Colossians 2:16. He also uses legalism based on food, drink, festival observance, Sabbath law.
16 Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. (Colossians 2:16, ESV)
And you might have been part of a church where there were so many rules. And if you didn’t follow these rules, you are shunned, you are ostracized. People would look down upon you as if this rule is equal to the truth. No, it could have been done with a good intention at first.
But a lot of times, this legalistic approach is not helpful. And Paul will explain further in Colossians 2:20-23.
20 If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations— 21 “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” 22 (referring to things that all perish as they are used)—according to human precepts and teachings? 23 These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh. (Colossians 2:20-23, ESV)
Then he goes into human regulations, which is, don’t do this, don’t do this, don’t do this. And even as parents, don’t we have certain regulations in your home? And so when you’re dealing with children, it’s not a free for all. And so we establish some guidelines. There are some regulations in the home, and that’s for order.
That’s for until they have the Holy Spirit in them, until they have a heart to obey God on their own. A parent who’s more mature has to put certain things in place.
But when we’re dealing with adults, do we have to put in these rules? That in this church, we have to follow these rules. And if you don’t, we’re gonna take you aside and you’re gonna get in trouble. We’re gonna correct you.
No, that’s not how God intended his church to operate. Also, it’s based on human precepts. And a precept is just a rule that guides one’s behavior. Like in a social setting, you need to observe these rules. And that’s just coming from a human. Like, who says at a church you need to dress up in a suit. That is almost like a rule.
And so think of how many people won’t feel comfortable stepping into that kind of a church. And they have all the good reasons. They have all the good reasons because we want to give God our best. I understand all the reasons why certain regulations and rules are in place.
But the goal here is love. The goal here is, what does God say? Does God say anything about our attire? Does God say anything about watching certain movies or not watching certain movies? I mean, there’s some guidelines, but there’s no rules.
We’re not people of the old covenant. We don’t follow rules in that sense. These human precepts that guide our behavior. Satan also, in Colossians 2, uses our weaknesses and desires against us. He says we have the appearance of wisdom. We just care a lot about how we come across.
We want to come across a certain way. So if you’re with educated people, you want to have this air of wisdom, this appearance of wisdom. And other people look at it, it seems wise, it seems right, but it’s all about appearances. We abandon these things, we don’t elevate these things.
And the argument that Paul is making, Colossians 2, that when you do this, the doctrine, the philosophy, the human tradition, the legalism, the human regulations, the human precepts, what you’re really doing is you’re creating your own religion.
It’s a self-made religion. You are deciding for yourself what is Truth, capital T. But it’s just coming from your sense of fear of the world or it’s coming out of a place which is not the heart of God. And he says you can be very harsh with your body.
There are certain practices. Fasting is good, but you can elevate that and say this is a rule; you need to be harsh with your body. And he warns in Colossians 2: don’t be a monk, don’t go into asceticism and treat your body harshly because you’re trying to reach an elevated state, a spiritual state. Because all of this, it says, has no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh. It’s just a self-made rule, religion, set of traditions and regulations.
So that’s how Satan will derail us. And then here is one of the summary verses of the book of Colossians 2:18. I’ll read this one.
Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, and not holding fast to the head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God.
18 Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, 19 and not holding fast to the Head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God. (Colossians 2:18-19, ESV)
This insistence on my way, and in this case it’s asceticism, you must abstain and deny yourself all the pleasures of life. And you must fast for 40 days and you must live like a monk and detach yourself from society. In so doing you’re going to reach a heightened state.
Isn’t this where a lot of religions came about? Somebody was on a mountain, somebody was participating in a four day fast, they were maybe smoking some mushrooms. And then some revelation came And a whole religious sect was formed based on this approach to truth. And he says, this is not how we grow. This is not a growth that is from God.
You might have the appearance of godliness and wisdom and self-restraint, but deep down you still have the flesh that is so alive. And you cannot curb these desires in you. The only way to grow is to connect with the head.
And that tells us that Satan’s ultimate goal is he wants to sever us from the head, sever us from Jesus, sever us from capital T, Truth. Because Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. There’s no growth apart from him. Apart from Jesus, you can do nothing.
6 Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (John 14:6, ESV)
5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:5, ESV)
But Satan will slip us in a counterfeit and say, oh, you can follow this program, you can follow this rule. You can be harsh with yourself. You can do something apart from Jesus. It seems like it’s related to Jesus, but it’s not Jesus. And you think that following these ways, you can grow? No, you can only grow if you stay connected and hold fast to the head which is Jesus.
Throughout church history, there were many movements in the Christian church. And among certain traditions, there was this monastic movement that I need to separate from society.
I need to live like a monk. I need to be very pious. I need to recite my prayers three times a day. I need to follow these rules. And actually I’m very good at that. I could have easily been a monk because I’m highly introverted, I’m very disciplined.
I could have easily ended up like this. But God says that’s not how you grow. Living like a monk, you’ll grow in piety, but you won’t grow the way that God wants us to grow, which is to grow in love.
Does God want his people to be separated in a monastery where you’re out of touch with everybody and maybe you’re protected from some of the corrupting influences out there, but is that the solution? We’re going to just block out everything in the world that’s bad?
We’re not going to interact with anybody except our family and maybe our church member. Is that what God wants? Is that the growth that God asks for? There’s even a popular pastor right now promoting these practices as if it’s the practice that will make a difference.
No, the practices don’t make a difference. What makes a difference is really connecting to the head who is Christ and holding fast to the head.
Satan wants you to let go and grab a counterfeit. That’s how he derails us. So we need to start speaking the truth. And what is the truth that we are to speak? Or who is the truth? The truth is Jesus, that we speak the truth, which is hold fast to our head, who is Christ.
Apart from him, you can do nothing. We can try to evangelize all of Bellflower. Apart from Jesus, we can do nothing. We want to speak the truth. And the truth is Jesus. Hold on to Jesus. Not just once and then follow some other program for most of your Christian life. No. You met him once, you meet him again and again and again.
You hold fast to Jesus, who is your head. You grow up into him in every way. You have to know him. You have to fellowship with him. Like, how does Jesus talk? How does Jesus act? What kind of heart does he have?
Always humble and lowly of heart. He is gentle in all of his ways. Jesus, I got to learn that from you. I’m not like you. I need to become more like you.
29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:29, ESV)
We hold fast to the head, who is Christ. Satan has many strategies to topple us. And so we might think, okay, the strategy then is, as a Christian, we need to have a strong, strong defense.
If you’re a basketball fan here, you know the Pistons from the 1980s, ’88, ’89. They were the bad boys. Isaiah Thomas and Joe Dumar. And they were.
If you watch the clips, they would clothesline Michael Jordan. That’s how they beat Michael Jordan. They weren’t better than Michael Jordan. They just roughed him up. And the refs back then, they let the players play, which I wish the NBA was like that. That’s the way it should be in my opinion. That is the glory days of the NBA.
But then we have, from the 1988-89 Pistons, you have the 2016, 2017 Golden State Warriors. And they did not win primarily with defense. They won with offense.
So for the Christians, are we like the Pistons or are we like the Warriors? What do you think? Strong defense, strong offense. Which one are we? Depends. Anyone want to choose a side, go on a limb. Which one? Which one should we do?
Yes, Alfonso. Strong defense. Because longevity. Okay. We got to keep ourselves safe. Sure, A Floyd Mayweather. Okay defense is definitely important, Stephanie, that’s a strong argument that you’re making with Ephesians 6 that we’re going to cover in a few weeks.
I think it’s a strong offense. Not that defense is wrong. We do need a strong defense.
If you’re a jeweler, how can you tell the counterfeit? You have special tools and you’re an expert at seeing the counterfeit. How do we spot the counterfeit, false gospels, the false teachings out there?
The reason why the jeweler can spot the counterfeit is because he is an expert of what the real jewel is supposed to be. He studied a real diamond for his whole career.
So if somebody is trying to pawn a piece of glass that looks like a diamond, like we think, oh, it’s a diamond, because we’re not trained. Right. But the jeweler, because he’s got an eye and he’s trained and he has the tools, right away, he can spot the counterfeit.
The Christian, how do we spot the Antichrist? Because he’s not broadcasting that he’s Satanic. No, it looks right. How do you discern that as wrong? By having a strong offense, by being very familiar with Jesus. Then if somebody comes with a counterfeit Jesus, right away, you know,.
If you don’t know Jesus that well and somebody slips you a counterfeit, you’ll say, oh, that’s plausible. Oh, that appears like Jesus. You let him in. You just accept what he says because you don’t have a strong offense. So that’s my case. We do need a strong defense. It’s true.
But if I’m going to choose, like, where am I going to put my attention? I could put my attention and become an expert on the Antichrist strategy and all the darkness and say, okay, I know where the Freemasons are coming from. I know where the Illuminati is coming from. I know where all these cults are coming from. I know their ways. And I can have a PhD in darkness and have maybe a defense and say, oh, I know what you’re doing there.
Or I can say with all of that energy that I’m focusing and studying darkness, why don’t I study the light? Why don’t I become an expert at who Jesus is and what the true gospel is? Then when the counterfeit comes, you’re not even stumbled by it. Right away, you can tell, oh, this is 90% there, but 10% off. And you don’t want that 10% because that will ruin you.
A strong offense is how we can have a strong defense. Now we speak the truth in love. Ephesians 4:1.
I, therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called. With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
There is one body and one Spirit, just as you are called to the one hope that belongs to your call. One Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
1 I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call— 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4:1-6, ESV)
We all say Amen to these verses that there is one Lord, there’s one Baptism, there’s one use of universal Church. Yet why is the Church divided? If we all agree with this and we’re speaking the truth at one another, why is it that the Church is divided? I think it’s because we lack a lot of love, starting with me. We lack a lot of love, so we speak a lot of truth. But if you don’t do it in love, you just lost a hearer.
If you discipline your child and what you say is 100% true, but you’re annoyed and you’re irritated and you don’t say it in love. And you secretly say, I can’t wait till this guy grows up and goes to college. I don’t want to deal with this. Some parents on a bad day, they might think that way. And what you said is spot on, 100% true. But you didn’t do it in love. You lost the relationship.
And that person will leave you and you might not see you except once or twice a year. They’re going to resent you, they’re going to blame you. Even though what you said was true. I want to really underscore that what you said as a parent was true.
You saw their immaturity, you saw the things, you’re trying to protect them from. You saw things that were not right. What you said was true. But if you didn’t say it in love, you might have lost a relationship.
We say things in churches that are spot on true. But if you don’t say it with love, even though we say we want to unify the church, what you said doesn’t actually unify. Because all that person heard was, wow, this person is convicted.
And if you don’t follow that conviction, the person hearing the conviction might feel like, okay, I’m not going to be accepted by that person because I don’t share that conviction. Am I going to hell? Is that the kind of truth we want to speak, that we’re so strong in our convictions?
But somebody who’s not there yet or may not share in those convictions, they’re not going to come back to church. They don’t want to fellowship with you because their conviction is still being formed, or maybe it’s a different conviction.
Now we can’t fellowship because I have a certain doctrine I follow, and your doctrine is a little different. Now we can’t fellowship, and I have a partial truth. You have a partial truth. We spoke to each other. We didn’t do it in love, and now we don’t want to see each other.
You know, truth alone doesn’t bring unity in God’s church. I don’t think it’s a shortage of truth is why the church is divided. It’s a shortage of love.
If we had more love, the church would be more united if we spoke and presented our convictions in a way that was easier to listen to. And you didn’t lose the hearer because they’re so bothered by your intensity or they’re annoyed and then they close their ear to everything you else have to say.
What’s more important, loving the person with truth or winning the argument? For me, it’s like I want to win the argument so much, and people disagree with me. In my heart, God gave me a picture. I’m like Joseph, you know, he was really wronged by his brothers in Egypt. He was sold into slavery. And then he became the pharaoh.
And he pretends that he doesn’t know his brothers. And they all gather, and they think they’re in trouble. They think this second command to Pharaoh, this governor is going to punish me. And he easily could have spoken the truth without love. He easily could have punished them. He easily could have made them feel guilty.
He easily could have done so many things and make them grovel at his feet and beg for forgiveness, and it would be true. Everything that he’s saying, like all the injustice and the wrong and the things that he had to go through, it’s true. It’s almost you could say it was in his right to go that direction.
And I have a picture that anybody who wrongs me, anybody who disagrees with me, like, I want to be elevated as right, and they will all grovel at my feet and say, oh, you’re right. That’s a wicked heart. That’s a really wicked heart.
Does it matter that you’re right about politics? We should pray for our country. I forgot to pray for our country. We will pray for our country.
It doesn’t matter that you see things in current events, right? And you have to show the other person how wrong they are.
And what you say is true, but you said it in a way that it was without love. And now they’re not going to show up for Thanksgiving. Okay, good. You won. You won. You’re right. And that person won’t see you in the holiday season.
Is that what we want? Is that what a Christian is? We have to be right. We are people of our conviction. So whether you can take it or not, I’m going to give you the truth because you need it. Because you shouldn’t fall into deception.
Our heart really matters. How we say things really matters. We can say things in love. We can say it without love. The same truth. We can say it with an air of superiority. We can say it with an I am really right. Someday you’re going to agree with me, or I’m just going to distance myself from you because I don’t want to be frustrated talking again and again.
We can talk and speak the truth with a lot of judgment. I’m better than you. I know better than you. I’m right. You’re wrong.
As parents, we speak a lot of truth with fear because we know what’s out there. We don’t want our kids to stumble. We don’t want them to be addicted. We don’t want them to go through all of what can happen in a person’s life. And so we share the truth. But it’s really coming out of fear, not love.
First John 4 says so. We have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love. And whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.
16 So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. (1 John 4:16, ESV)
Did you know God’s essence is love? And so if we’re fellowshiping with Jesus, who is the Son of God, who is the head of the church, his nature flows in supposed to.
And so over time, it should be said of us, oh, that person is a loving person. Not that we’re so truthful. We’re so right. We’re so discerning. That’s okay. But we want to be known as people who are loving. Like, approachable. People feel safe around us. They don’t feel like, I have to clean up my act before I talk to you.
I have to get everything ordered before I share. I Have to clean up my act. No, it is a love like God. Think of the prodigal son and the Father’s heart. He’s not lecturing the son. He’s not like making the Son do penance and prove that he’s really repentant.
No, just open arms, running to the son. That’s the Father’s heart. Because his nature is love. So think of all of us. We all in God’s church, we all have partial truth. None of us have the full truth. We all have our blind spots.
We all have our weaknesses. And so when God sees his children fighting and speaking truth at one another, what do you think God, who is love, whose essence is love, what do you think he says about his church? I think God must be grieving.
And the reason why we’re disunified is because the church of God, corporately and individually, I would say we’re all lacking love. We’re all lacking love. Starting with me.
First Corinthians 13. Last week we covered chapter 12, the Spiritual gifts. The verse ends with, okay, the gifts are fine, but now I will show you a more excellent way.
31 But earnestly desire the higher gifts. And I will show you a still more excellent way. (1 Corinthians 12:31, ESV)
It’s not about the gifts. You can have gifts and use them all in the wrong way. You can have a gift and use it to puff yourself up and exercise the gift, or you can use it in love for the common good.
And all of chapter 13 is, what’s the point of having a tongue, a spiritual gift of a human language or of an angel, if you have not love? You’re a clanging symbol. It’s just noise.
And then he describes what love is patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast. It’s not arrogant, not rude, does not insist on its own way.
Even convictions like you have to do it this way. No, there’s no insistence on my way. It’s not irritable, resentful, does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:1-7, ESV)
When we speak the truth, do we have these characteristics, this fruit that is coming out, the fruit of the Spirit? The love, the joy, the patience, the bearing with one another, believing, hoping, seeing the best in somebody else, instead of really highlighting the negatives and repeating it over and over and amplifying the negatives and only sharing with others the negatives?
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23, ESV)
No, we believe the best about that brother, that sister. We hope in that person. We hope that God will continue to grow that person. I’m still growing, you’re still growing. And so we have that kind of a heart of love for all God’s people.
The one caveat, we speak the truth in love to everybody. But as people said, we do need a strong defense. And Jesus warns, in Matthew 7, beware of false prophets. They come in sheep’s clothing, inwardly their ravenous wolf, and you will recognize them by their fruit.
15 “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. 16 You will recognize them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17 So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit.(Matthew 7:15-17, ESV)
And then Jesus is very harsh in Matthew 23 to scribes and Pharisees. He calls them hypocrites. He says, you’re just, just surface level. You look good, but inwardly nothing’s changing. you’re actually evil on the inside.
25 “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and the plate, but inside they are full of greed and self-indulgence. (Matthew 23:25, ESV)
And so Jesus doesn’t speak in a loving way to false teachers because he cares about us. He doesn’t want the sheep to suffer, and the sheep are suffering under false teachers. And so out of that heart, he doesn’t speak lovingly to a false teacher or to a scribe, a Pharisee, a legalistic teacher. He doesn’t share in a loving way to these people.
And that’s why even in 2 John 1, the apostle John urges us not to even allow such people into our home.
10 If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house or give him any greeting, 11 for whoever greets him takes part in his wicked works. (2 John 1:10, ESV)
So that’s where I land. If I discern somebody is a false teacher, I will pray for you, but don’t think I’m going to be nice to you and we’re going to have a loving conversation. Actually, we’re not going to even fellowship. You can’t even come to my house.
So I take that stand because Jesus took that stand and the early church took that stand. But to everyone else who’s not a false teacher, a false prophet, we speak the truth in love. How do we do this?
You might be saying, I want to speak the truth in love, but every time I say it, I say it with judgment. Every time I speak the truth, I’m annoyed. Every time I speak the truth, I think I’m better. I’m judging the other person.
How do we share our convictions in a way that it’s still loving? And you win the person over in time, over time. How do we do this? The answer is in Ephesians 4:20-24. And I’ll end with these.
But that is not the way you learned Christ, assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus.
To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the Spirit of your minds, to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.
20 But that is not the way you learned Christ!— 21 assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, 22 to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, 23 and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, 24 and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. (Ephesians 4:20-24, ESV)
I’m sure after a long day at the ranch, you’re covered in dust and dirt and odors from being with the animals. And you would not go to sleep in your working clothes and wake up the next day and just live that way.
All the things that are dirty in us, at the end of the day, we take it off and we put on a fresh, fresh pair of clothes. We don’t want our bed to be dirty. And so we want to be presentable the following morning. We do this. We put off and we put on. All of Christian life is repent and believe. Repent and believe.
There are things in us that are not right. We repent of those things. It is putting off. But if you stop there and you just say you put off and then you put on a rule, or you put on asceticism, or you put on a program, or you put on a set of regulations, or you put on a behavior that you’re trying to imitate in somebody else, you’re not going to change. You’re going to be frustrated, taking the same clothing again and again.
So it’s not just putting off and repenting. We repent and we believe. Meaning, we go to Jesus. We hold fast to the head. Jesus says, come to me in Matthew 11.
So we bring all of the things that are wrong in us. We repent and we put off and we give it to Jesus. Jesus, I’m judgmental. I know that’s not right. Please I repent of this. I give it to you, Jesus.
You’re putting off your judgmental heart and you’re putting on the nature of Christ. Jesus, you’re not judgmental, Jesus, you’re kind. Jesus, you’re humble.
And so you put that on as you fellowship with Christ. It is a putting off, a putting on, repentance and believe.
An example of this is in Ephesians 4:31. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:31-32, ESV)
We put off the bitterness. If you think about certain people, if you think about your past, doesn’t a lot of bitterness flood to your memory?
Even what happened earlier today, Somebody was rude to you, somebody said this to you, somebody didn’t treat you well. And this bitterness just rises up. It’s like a ketchup stain on your white, clean clothing.
Alfonso is wearing a pure white, freshly pressed and imagine you got a ketchup stain, you got to deal with that. You don’t want to walk around with that stain. You take it off, you wash it by the blood of Jesus, washing of his word, the blood of Jesus. You’re bringing it to Jesus and you’re putting on his nature. It’s a transaction.
When you go to Jesus, you give him your old nature, you get his new nature, repent and believe. You put off the bitterness, the anger, the wrath, clamor, slander. You put on the nature of Christ. Jesus was kind. Jesus was tenderhearted. His heart toward other was tender. It was soft.
Don’t we just cut people off, Just. I’m not just going to deal with you anymore. That’s how we deal with people. I’m going to cut you off. You don’t treat me, I’m just going to cut you off. Our heart hardens toward that person.
No, we should be tender. Like, I want to win this person through my kindness, my conviction. Okay, I have convictions. But let me share it in a way that I can win this person over. Because you want to.
We want to win people, not be right. We want to win people over for Christ, forgiving one another. How can we ask God to forgive us if we’re not forgiving people all the time? People wrong us all the time. Let’s not hold on to these things. Let’s not hold on to grudges.
We need to bring them to Jesus. Say, Jesus, I was annoyed. Please forgive me. I forgive them. Jesus, please forgive me. Give me your nature, which is quick to forgive.
How could Jesus forgive on a cross as he’s being crucified, saying, Father, forgive them. They don’t even know what they’re doing. That is the kind of heart that he wants to birth in us.
Instead of being so easily irritated and annoyed and holding onto grudges and cutting people off and being so hardened toward people. Well, I got my convictions. You don’t want to hear it. Tough. You’re on your own. That is not the heart of God. We don’t want to be that way. We want to be winsome, attractive. We want to be approachable.
We want people from all walks of life to feel safe around us. They can share anything. We’ll pray for them. There won’t be any judgment. We’re going to love them into the kingdom. We want to be that kind of a person. And so how do we do this? We. We put off and put on. We repent and we believe.
Okay, let’s pray.
Father, forgive us. For all the ways that we lack love, in some areas we are truthful and we know the truth and our convictions are right on the money. But Lord, we so quickly speak these truths out of annoyance, out of pride, out of feeling better, out of wanting to prove others wrong and I’m right.
We share truth without love from a wrong heart. Forgive us, Lord, we give our hearts to you now. Holy Spirit, search us. You know each of us so well.
So in this time, as we wrap up this service in prayer, we pray that you would search us. In what ways are we lacking love? In what ways are we speaking the truth without love, speaking it out of fear and frustration, but not love?
Lord, we bring our heart to you, our speech to you, our attitudes to you, our perspective to you, all our flaws to you. We bring them to you. We ask you to forgive us. We’re putting off our old nature.
We pray that you clean us up by the blood of Jesus and the washing the Word of God, that you would wash us and cleanse us. As we close out this service, we want to put on your nature. You promise that when we give you a heavy burden, you will give us a lighter burden.
We give you our old nature. You give us your nature, which is so much better, so much lighter. We want your nature, Lord. We ask that you birth in us a growing love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.
We want to be forgiving, quick to forgive, and want to be loving. We want to be quick to bear with one another’s sins, quick to forgive. Change us, Lord.
Thank you for the body that was broken on Calvary and the blood that was shed. Thank you that you give us an opportunity to partake in your Lord’s Supper every Sunday to declare there is only one body and we’re all united in Christ.
Thank you, Lord.
